


past the windows of the blissfully dead

by CorpselovingCorpse



Series: Lullaby [1]
Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Canonical Child Abuse, Child Abuse, Child Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Minor Character Death, Self-Harm, don't be weird, likke not at all, this is not in a shippy way
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:00:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25801735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CorpselovingCorpse/pseuds/CorpselovingCorpse
Summary: The Earl Trancy is a disgusting Man and Jim hates him.Jim Hates his liver-spotted hands, the way they move like fat pale spiders, sick things that only know how to hurt. He hates the way he smiles, all rotten teeth, he hates his foul breath.He hates everything about him.[...]Jim Hates the Earl.But he hates the basement even more.
Relationships: Former Earl Trancy/Alois Trancy
Series: Lullaby [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1871908
Comments: 5
Kudos: 14





	past the windows of the blissfully dead

**Author's Note:**

> Okay this is a Kuroshitsuji Fic, centered around Alois so yeah it is going to get Dark.  
> All mistakes are mine because I have no beta.  
> I REALIZED THAT I FUCKED UP AND THIS HAD THE WRONG TITTLE   
> The actual title was "past the windows of the blissfully dead" and i put "His arms are all around me and his tongue in my eyes" and thats the title of the second part.  
> Just Changed it but.... Cringe

The Earl Trancy is a disgusting Man and Jim hates him.

Jim Hates his liver-spotted hands, the way they move like fat pale spiders, sick things that only know how to hurt. He hates the way he smiles, all rotten teeth, he hates his foul breath.

He hates everything about him.

Jim Hates him more than he hated his mother for dying, he hates him more than he hated the villagers who mistreated Luka and Him.

He would rather die than let that man touch him.

He would rather die than look at his horrible bloated face.

Then he spends his first week in the basement and discovers something really interesting about himself.

He hates the Dark, he hates the smell of the other boys, dirty and unwashed.

He hates the stupid maids, with their empty eyes and frozen smiles.

Jim Hates the Earl.

But he hates the basement even more.

  
  


*

The Older boys talk about those who came before them. They talk about their quality clothes, silks, and cotton soft and warm. They talk about their hot meals, with hunger in their stomachs and poison in their voices.

They all want what those other kids had, they want out.

Yes, They all fear the earl and his wandering hands, but they aren't stupid. They Know that some weeks in the light are better than washing away in the dark of the basement.

The Earl is generous with those boys who please him.

Of Course, Jim Knows that he won’t be picked too soon. His eyes are too blue and dead, he doesn’t smile or pleads or cowers. He just exists there.

He is… Impure.

It is funny that someone so foul and disgusting cares that much about purity. Maybe what really gets him off is knowing that he is ruining them. Like a Pig Soiling fine marble.

_**Disgusting.** _

  
  
  


*

  
  


Jacob is the first to go. He is barely ten and has one of those beauties who won’t survive his teenage years. Big Green eyes and brown hair full of delicate curls.

They all hate and pity him. He won't last long, boys like him never do, they break easily.

He is too pretty and soft, too docile and obedient.

The Earl is a spider, he loves the struggle. 

Where is the fun in prey who doesn’t want to run away? He likes the chase, a little bit of… cheekiness and poor, poor Jacob has none of it.

After only two days the Maids arrive to retrieve another boy and Jim smiles to himself, nails digging into the soft skin of his arms.

Soon they will have to choose him, they will have no other choice, and then, even if only for a moment, he will be free.

  
  


*

Jacob, docile pretty Jacob, was sent away, some of the Ear friends like pretty sweet boys. 

Everyone knows that getting sent away is a fate worse than the basement.

Bill, dark-haired, and foul-mouthed Struggled too much and ended up hurting himself. 

What a Shame, the maids had said, while cleaning all the blood, Bill was the prettiest of them all. He could have lasted.

After Bill came Arthur.

Arthur still had hope, he still believed that he could be saved, so he Ran.

Didn’t make it too far and the dogs got him.

Even down there they could hear him scream.

Jim Knows how’s next, the maids will choose someone resilient, a boy that lasts more than a couple of weeks, something pretty that will entertain the Earl until they can get new merchandise.

Robert is the Obvious Choice, he is pale as moonlight, with dark blonde hair. His eyes, just like Jim's, are dirty too. 

He is smart and a good actor, he has the maids eating from his grime-covered hands, what a polite and charming boy.

Jim knows deep in his bones, that if Robert goes out there he could survive, he could become the Earl’s favorite. Robert would charm everyone and live in the light, sleeping in a feather-soft bed, perfumed with rosewater. He would make the Earl forget about the other boys. 

Forget about him.

He would wither away and rot in the basement and become food for the rats.

Jim cannot allow that, he won't die down there, he will survive, even if he has to get his hands even dirtier.

  
  


They don’t come for Robert that night, they don’t come for anyone.

Jim listens to the maids, they chatter with each other while they distribute the gruel they call food. 

The Earl is out of town, visiting some acquaintances, a Viscount, or something like that, they say.

He will be gone for a week.

Jim cannot contain his laughter. Either God or the devil or lick or fate wants to give him a chance.

They are all by his side. They Want Him To Live.

  
  
  


*

  
  
  


Some kind of stomach bug has gotten the other boys.

Maybe food poisoning said, one maid.

Maybe the plague said another.

Jim knows it is food poisoning. After all, it is his doing.

For the last four days, he has been hiding his food under his bed, if one could call that thin and dirty cot a bed.

By the second day he is starving, but he knows that his sacrifice will help him get out.

When the maids come next morning he offers to help them distribute the food, they are all overworked and hate it down there so they just leave the pot down there.

Mixing the spoiled food is easy.

Now… Now he just has to wait.

The smell is nauseating, all the others are weak and feverish. The smell of shit and puke is unbearable.

The maids come to get Robert and discover that the only one healthy enough to entertain The Earl is Jim.

Jim, too skinny, too impure, too blond, with too dead eyes.

The Boy Leaves the Basement knowing that he will never have to go back again.

  
  


*

The water smells like oranges and roses and the bathing tube is a luxurious thing made of white porcelain and copper. 

The soap is soft and pink and shaped like a flower.

Jim _loves_ and _hates_ it.

He sits there while the maids, the horrible maids with sharp harpy hands and knowing eyes get rid of the basement smell and scrub the grim that covers him.

They are rough and pinch and pull, their calloused hands touching every inch of him.

He lets them do, eyes looking at the dark paneled walls.

They brush his hair until it shines like spun gold in the morning sun. They rub his pale skin with oils and perfumes until he is soft and tender and almost… almost relaxed.

He listens to their instructions.

Call the earl “Father”, smile, cower and whimper. Be a good boy or you will end with the others. There are fates worse than the basement, kid.

Jim smiles beatifically and lets them continue.

He knows that nothing is worse than the basement, he also knows that he will do anything that takes to survive.

  
  
  


*

  
  


The Robe is too big for him, a soft and expensive thing. Scarlet and gold, with heavy embroidery. Tacky… devoid of class, pretty like an expensive whore.

He could have fed himself and Luka for a whole year with the money used to buy something like that.

Jim Shakes his head. Luka is long gone, he mustn't think about him, not now.

He pinches his cheeks until they are pink and flushed, takes a deep breath, and walks towards the door.

He has work to do.

  
  


*

Jim... Jim is a vision, he is the prettiest thing The Earl has ever seen.

The man falls on his knees, kissing the boy’s feet, worshiping him.

There is something grotesque about the scene.

Jim, in red and gold, a childlike beauty, something almost pure, almost holy, while the earl, old, bloated and decrepit is on his knees, kissing his feet and calling him son.

Jim wants to laugh because he knows that he has the Earl under his controls now.

Jim wants to cry because he knows that it is all a game. The Earl holds all the powers, he might worship him now, he might think that Jim is the most beautiful creature in the creation, but if he makes a mistake, if he hesitates, he could be sent back into the basement, into the darkness.

And Jim hates the Darkness.

*

And then… Then he lays with the Earl and realizes something...

Maybe the darkness wasn’t that bad. 

The Darkness didn't hurt this much.

It takes him all his self-control not to beg him to send him back.

*

  
  


He didn’t **cry.**

He struggled enough to make the earl want him more, he whimpered and begged him for more. He called him father between fake moans.

But **he didn’t cry.**

  
  


*

  
  


He waited until the earl fell asleep before leaving the bed. His body was sore and it hurt to move. 

Still, he couldn’t stay there, he had to getaway.

In the room next door, the copper, and porcelain tub awaited for him, cold, like his mother’s grave.

It still smelled like roses and oranges and inside it, covered by the luxurious red robe, Jim Cried as he has never cried before.

He did not cry for himself. He was Alois Trancy now and Alois didn’t need him to cry.

He cried for Luka, beloved Luka who died alone in the darkness.

He cried for the boys in the basement, for the ones who came before him, for the ones who would never leave, the ones who would wither and rot in the putrid darkness while he enjoyed the sun.

At last, he cried for Jim, poor Jim who had died the moment he set a foot out of that horrible basement. Jim who had died again when the Earl had touched him.

Jim Who Had Died so Alois Trancy Could Live

  
  


*

  
  
  


_**The earl Trancy is a wonderful father, and Alois Loves Him.** _

**Author's Note:**

> This is parts of a series, i have other two one-shots already written. I will post them soon.  
> Probably.


End file.
